Kandahar Air Base is home to the legendary "Poo Pond". You can judge your direction in relation to the smell. It actually helped me find my way around the base the first few days. Here's an article in the NY Times...
http://atwar.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/05/26/the-poo-pond/. The smell isn't quite as bad early in the mornings, so I've opted to 0500 runs to give my lungs a break from the stench. Maybe I should try to peppermint oil under the nose? Isn't that what morticians use? Anywho, it is a horrific smell!
My next big concern are the camel spiders... more like my biggest fear! Since I've been in the Army I've been worried that I would some day come in contact with one of these legendary creatures. I think my days are numbered before that happens. We've already had a sighting around the barracks. He was up under a second story window the other night (thank goodness I was safe inside). The girls thought he was about the size of a kitten. They said he shot off quickly after a mouse before they could confirm his size. Then last night, I think I saw some camel spider movement by the barracks next to ours. I was waiting outside for someone and heard this chirping sound, so I looked over... and saw a leg and some movement! Suddenly I broke out in a sweat. I was standing out by the road by this time, far from those sandbags! I know it's inevitable, but I am taking every precaution to stay away from possible hiding spots and shady areas. Camel spiders like shade, and apparently the smell of poo. I've been told, from first-hand experienced folks, that they will wait for you outside the porta-johns because they are attracted to the smell of poo! They will stand up begging for a scoobie poo snack or something. So you know what that means? I cannot poo in a port-john without a spidee guard. They will also chase you if you run. I know someone that ran with one! They seek shade, so this one was running behind him to catch his shadow. This is real stuff friends! I am in great danger.
The last threat I want to tell you about is the drop bear. It is actually a lot more scary than the camel spider... but I am still more terrified of the gigantic domestic animal-sized spider. Anyway. The war in Afghanistan is a Coalition fight, so we have forces from all over the world here. Well apparently the Aussies have brought this little lively weapon over to fight... unfortunately it cannot be tamed and a danger to all! They drop down on you from low-hanging trees and ferociously attack! So now I have to stay away from shady areas, unguarded porta-johns, and trees. (Luckily I haven't seen any trees here.)
Okay, maybe the drop bears aren't real. But the first two dangers are real!
That drop bear poster is just disturbing....
ReplyDeleteI can handle the bears....the spiders freak me out.
ReplyDeletewe had a camel spider mounted and framed in our team room. had a 4" body and 10" legspan. could eat your sockmonkey....
ReplyDeletejust saying.